December 2009
i need to stop obssessing over self harm and go to bed.
this should really be called ramblings of an...
okay so SUPRISE SUPRISE, i can’t sleep again. its 5.02am. my eyes feel like they’re going to drop out of my skull-and not in a good way. i’m in a very peculiar mood.
please use my body while i sleep, my lungs are fresh and yours to keep, kept clean and they will let you breathe.
i really don’t know what else to write. this shouldn’t really be a blog, it should...
“I almost feel sorry for what I’m going to do, and your hair smells of...”
“one, two, freddy’s coming for you. three, four, better lock your door....”
So, its 4.39 am and i’ve just tried to eat christmas dinner and i’m now watching peep show, was getting drunk with my sister but she dissapeared to make pasta and i think she’s gone to bed, haha. Now i feel really sick and want to vomit everywhere. I managed to avoid christmas day completely :D. i slept all day and refused to get out of bed so it was all good. i woke up for a few...
I hate christmas. i really hoped it would be different this year. obviously it’s not. just fuck off christmas.
“i envy your demise, i hope it’s all you dreamed it would be, one bullet in...”
i love manson and gaga but i hate stitches.
i am in so much pain. SO much pain. my stitches are painful and probably infected. sickgross. i also cannot stop listening to manson and lady gaga, they even have a song together <3 :D. i put up new fairy lights in my room today and they look really pretty and i’m really happy about them! but i’m really, really not looking forward to christmass aghhhhh. i know i’m probably one...
okay so i need to rant, so here is a good place to do it right?
i can’t sleep (again), but got my stella next to me. not the beer but my cat, haha. but no i actually have serious issues to rant about so here we go; some people make me so fucking sick to my stomach like seriously why would you pretend to be someone your not? its just fucking pointless since your going to get found out in the...
“no no I know you need it, so so I need it too and oh oh I must keep going, so...”
November 2009
i am scared okay? i don’t know if i can do this. also i have to go to the burns unit tomorow which im not happy about, i dont like going there :(. but yeah everything’s just a big mess at the moment and i want it sort itself out but i know i have to do something for that to happen, also i’m going back to NA! so maybe i’ll see some people i havnt seen in a good few years,...